“To survive you often have to fight, and to fight you have to dirty yourself. War is evil, and it is often the lesser evil.”- Antonio Brown
Through narrow roads we have reached the summit. In the past month, I have been forced to abandon my innocence and integrity in the pursuit of what is right. The following admission is made with a clear heart and mind. Throughout December 2021, I directed Guccifer 2.0 and a Russian troll farm in a campaign to manipulate the outcome of the first round of playoffs. This global effort directly led to the defeats of the 76th Street Rat Kings and the Christian McGibblets. Justice has been served bringing down the tyrants who have ruled over this league from its inception. May the children dance in the street and drink the blood of our former overlords!
On a more somber note, I am formally resigning as manager of America’s Next Popp Model effective immediately. As a man of honor who spent the whole season calling for Pat to answer for his crimes, I recognize the need to leave the league after using the very tactics I had been chastising. This type of behavior should never be acceptable, no matter the motive. That said, I regret nothing and am enormously proud to have slayed the hydra that was Pat.
Sacrifices were made to bring down the oligarchy but I am confident a brighter fantasy football future lies ahead. I want to remind all of you that I will be forming a new, ethical fantasy football league for next season. As a result of recent events, I am pleased to announce that I have already recruited two prestigious founding league members: Russian President Vladimir Putin and American Activist QAnon. I hope you choose to join us next season.
Praise The New Sunday!
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